Kadiara Jewell, the baker of Ireem, was accosted today while on a delivery just outside of the city. Though she was mercilessly attacked, she managed to make her way back to safety as fast as her slippered feet could carry her.

Nonetheless, the small woman is indignant at the attack upon her person. Until further notice, slavers are banned from purchasing any of her wares. "I don't care how hungry they look - I won't sell to them until this wrong is addressed!" she was heard to say. "No baklava, no sweetmeats, no pies, no pitas... Nothing!"

It seems that a threat from afar is once again threatening our kingdom's way of life. Three strange creatures, identifying themselves as ancient magi spirits, have attacked our kingdom with a systematic attempt to slay our strongest warriors. Fortunately a defense was mobilized, but the threat from these entities is still very significant, with Skip Thespian describing thier fighting skill as "simply the best I have ever seen."

The slaver Raychelle Blaisdale and Undead jester Kahdoosch were walking on a path near the auction site when the three spirits decended upon them from a place they couldn't identify and immediately started attacking. Skip Thespian, one of the contenders for the recently-ended Magi leadership elections, entered the fray shortly thereafter, followed by Raychelle's fellow slaver, Storm. After a fierce fight, the spirits fled into the outer courtyard of the palace to heal their wounds before engaging in a second skirmish.

The spirits eventually returned to the outer palace courtyard where Raychelle summoned me to view the scene, followed by Skip, the Djinn Leader Nakira Tennen, and a mysterious knight by the name of Vajra Khandr who seemed naturally able to understand the spirits' language. After speaking with the spirits, Vajra informed us of the distrubing news: These creatures had come to Ireem to punish "Sinners", and defined "Sinners" as people who had sex, meaning approximately about 99% of Ireem's population. (The creatures even referred to myself, the paragon of innocence and virtue, as "Sinner"... how rude.) This was the main bit of information we learned before the creatures disappeared, claiming to be "called to heaven".

UPDATE: Later, Skip was casting a spell to commune with greater powers, seeking knowledge about the spirits that had come to our kingdom and was driven mad, attacking and defeating his girl Stela in combat. He was finally subdued by the honorable knights Enigma and Seraf, and cured of his condition by the Magi Leader, Anneliese Wolfenhaut.

It's hard to say what will become of the situation with these creatures - the majority of Ireem seems to fall into the catagory of "Sinner" according to them, and even those who do not are not immune to thier attacks, as shown by Dungeon Guard Dalilah Sirnah, who was attacked by the creatures, despite being a virgin (or so she claims) :) It's certain that the creatures can attack at any time though, so be on your guard, horny denizens of Ireem!

(* OOC Note from the Author: It is Thanksgiving in the United States, a holiday that brings family together from around the country. It is a time of giving thanks for things that are special to you.)

Across a sun blasted desert you emerge,
a mirage, a goddess.

you let us chase and fight....

you let us love..
in all its forms..

We hold your hearts,
for the briefest of time..

and then we let you go..

but always a part of you remains..

We are not worthy of your love, yet you love us still..

and we love you all...

Thank you for sharing the most important part of you..

Anonymous, Nov. 2008

Looking for some new outfits? Mora Lewinter, Ireem's new seamstress, would like to offer her masterfully crafted products for purchase. She has been working with some gorgeous navy blue silk and currently has two outfits available, as shown here:

The desert was stained red again recently as a Bedouin caravan, led by the hilerious-when-drunk Sir Jordan with nayeli Sweetwater acting as scout, made its way past the knights' camp and into the open area of desert near the city gates, where it was ambushed by the odd couple of enigmatic Magi Marylin Breen and the hunky walking undead Maynard Schmooz. The fierce battle that erupted left a camel dead, and caravan-hand Friski Quintessa fleeing for her life while Daphne Mortenwold and Jorden defended the goods. Quickly, Jordan guided the remaining camels away from the ambush in a chaotic mess of a display, aided by Friski tripping the Magi to cover his escape, while undead scourage Tobi Etzel ambushed the Daphne on the sands. In a very close fight that clearly demonstrated Daphne's considerable prowess with the blade, the more experienced Tobi squeaked out a victory, capturing the Bedouin for a short time before Jordan returned for his crewmember and drove the weakened captor off.

In the end, some fare was lost to the Magi, no doubt for use in making a magical concoction to aid in her husband's (Slaver Leader Grandpa Wong) 'special' medicines, and it is not known what Jordan was able to stash away in his camp, but let's hope it includes lots of alcohol for his personal consumption.

For Daphne's part, she has sworn vengeance on Tobi for her narrow defeat at his hands. Time will tell if Tobi can defend himself from this young upstart....

The party was a success, with the Ship's Inn being completely crowded by partying individuals celebrating Jonathon's election. The food was delicious, as were the men and women, and true to form for any good Ireem party, clothes started to be shed rapidly as the evening rolled on and partygoers became more frisky with each other :)

The perils of alcohol were evident, however, as Ireem was also treated to the very entertaining antics of extremely drunk Bedouins Chris Wilder and Sir Jordan. Chris reportedly had to be carried out of the bar by his faithful girl Olive, who made this statement: "I was very disappointed in his behaviour and that combined with other recent events has led to me request that he wander Ireem wearing a tag that states "I'm a Bone Head occassionally, but Oli still loves Me". Additionally, Sir Jordan's unrestrained merriment and lust for removing random clothing was only matched by his lack of coordination and increasingly disturbing numbers of half-naked Djinns he kept seeing. (Although Djinns are known for thier illusions.. perhaps he was seeing something that nobody else did?) A complaint has been additionally filed against Sir Jordan for defacing public property by peeing on the auction stand as he returned to his home camp. Will the terror never end?

Meanwhile, in the aftermath of the party, a group of the kingdom's finest girls (Pictured Left to Right: Dinky Wingtips, Olive MacMoragh, and Selena Sigal) took over the often-claimed hill in the middle of the desert, renaming it officially "Hard to Tame Hill", and making this statement: "It's our hill now because we say so! It will stay ours, and anyone who wants to stay there should ask our permission." Can anyone in Ireem possibly argue with this claim? It seems that it may truly stay "Hard to Tame" hill this time, much to the relief of the kingdom cartographers. You never know who still awaits their chance to claim the often-disputed hill, however.....

On recent article published in this paper, one anonymous knight commented that there is indeed NO chastity vow taken by the knights. As it happened, this was something I was investigating, my curiosity having been piqued by the reference in Bikku's note and the fact that I've never seen any firm evidence that the infamous code exists.

Asking two senior knights, Camell Uggla and Dream Questi, it was clarified for me that indeed, our paper's commenter was correct: The infamous Vow of Chastity required to be taken by all knights does not exist. However, individual knights may indeed take such vows as is thier personal preference. Perhaps this is the way the rumor got started in the first place? Or, perhaps more insidiously, some unseen force in our kingdom devised this evil plan as a way of keeping all of Ireem's knights sexually frustrated. Either way, let the truth be known!

Before knights start taking off thier armor just yet, let them heed the wise words of Dream on his vision for the knights: "[It's] up to the knight.. but the best of knights, they only involve themselves in meaningful things and exhibit self control; A lost art in this land." "[They] should have meaningful relationships and not succomb to the whims of desire... especially [for] others who may not have your best interest."

It remains to be seen what the implications of this revelation are. Perhaps now the knights, so far immune to the wave of pregnancies striking our kingdom, will now have little ones coming? Or perhaps the knights, in their constant service to the prey of the kingdom, will begin taking them to their camp and showing them a good time while the dangerous denizens of the desert are off waving their swords around?

Time will tell. :)

The party for Jonathan Moriarty is coming up in just over an hour!! I tracked down the Bedouin leader and asked if he had anything to say about the occaision. After threatening to behead me for setting foot in his tent, the normally pleasant (and always handsome) Bedu had this to say:

"I only want to ask everyone to forget tribal warfare and to mix in and simply enjoy themselves; wear what they like, forget prey, predator, knight, etcetera and just have fun... *coughs* The knights could even forget their vows of chastity - just for the one night..."

As I was wandering through the streets of the city, a frantic Kadiara Jewell ran up to me smelling of the most delicious blend of aromas and was kind enough to deliver a menu for the evening. From what I saw in the window of her shop, the cuisine at the event will certainly be a delight for all who attend.

Kadiara will be serving:

  • Sun-dried dates stuffed with almonds
  • Sun-dried Apricots brushed with cinnamon
  • Olives stuffed with goat cheese mashed with coriander, caraway, and cumin seeds
  • Kebabs of spicy lamb chunks skewered along with onion, peppers, and eggplant
  • Hummus
  • Flatbreads and Pitas
  • Fatayer Bisabankh - little pies filled with seasoned spinach and onions
  • Grilled Chicken Wings with Lemon and Garlic
  • Eggplant Meatballs with spicy tomato sauce tossed with parsley
  • Garlic Pita Crisps for dipping into:
  • Hot Pepper Dip
  • Mint-Yogurt Dip
  • Chick-pea and Sesame Dip
  • Fried Zucchini with Garlic Yogurt
  • And finally, a delicate, melt-in-your-mouth baklava with its many layers of thin dough, chopped pistachios and walnuts, and sweet, golden honey
REMEMBER! The party is being held at 2pm SLT at the Ship's Inn, which you can reach if you start from the auction area, and take the path to the southwest around the city.

I was given this note recently by a grim-looking Bikku, who was wearing that really hot black number that drove me wild while she was undead, the one that made me just want to crawl up to her feet and wrap myself around them licking her leg... It's fortunate for me that the note included actual news, because I probably would have been happy to violate my superior journalistic standards for that sexy-girl-gone-bad.... wow...

It's the sad truth that I have been bested in a very close fight with the slaver leader, WongFei (grrrr... it was such a close fight~~I'll get you next time you drunken monkey). He has felt the loss of one of his most vicious fighters, Raychelle Blaisedale, and decided that as punishment the Knights will forfeit me to the Slaver's camp for the same week of Raychelle's Knighthood.

Karma at work, folks, never underestimate the power of the world being round.

Now~~The questions: Who will watch over the blazing Raychelle as a Knight? Is there anyone strong enough to redirect her Slaver spirit into the ways of the Knights? Will she obey the (gulp) chastity vow of the Knights (does anyone?)? Will you, Storm, ever stop the bloody rampage you are wrapping around Ireem in your desire to regain your sister? Will Anneliese ever find the "perfect hair"? Will the Knights ever synchronize their dancing (Apple Bottom Jeans, Benny Hill) perfectly and go on tour? Will Jordina and Arian single-handedly repopulate the Knights group after their marriage? Will anyone EVER capture Sage? Did you know that you can actually sit on the bird at the front gates and take a little sky tour of Ireem (wait until he lands)?

But I digress.

Personally, with some trepidation, I look forward to my experience as a Slaver until Wednesday. I look on it as an opportunity to show the Slavers that compassion for the prey will benefit them immensely in their trade..more so than the cruelty which seems so acceptable. Kindness will inspire loyalty and compliance from what they now call "cargo".

They will only capture a prey one time with their current vulgarity. There are a few Slavers who have caught on to the better method I will try to employ. These Slavers know that regarding a prey as an actual human will create fondness and a chance to capture them over and over again because they trust in the Slaver.. thus, they earn more dinar... Those shortsighted strategies are actually COSTING them dinar.

Forgive my defection, Knights, but I will use this time to learn. I may not behave like myself, and you may have to strike me, it will all be forgiven on Wednesday. I know you do as you must to protect Ireem.

Remember that my heart is always

Bikku the Knight

Sage approached me today with a rather troubling request. It would appear that many of the humans of Ireem do not know what a djinn is, so she has asked me to write an article to explain. I find it my duty as djinn leader to clear up some common misunderstandings, and perhaps give you a small glimpse into what it is like to be a djinn.

First and foremost, we are not quite the same as demons. Some of us are evil, and some of us are good. Most of us fall somewhere in the middle. Like forces of nature, we are hard to control, difficult to explain, and can be both harmful and beneficial, depending on our mood and our personalities.

Another common mistake is that we are the same as the magi, since we can both 'do magic'. This could not be further from the truth. Most magi are humans who learn to channel magic though long hours of book study and practice. (And despite what some may tell you, they are not to be trusted!) Djinn simply ARE magical beings, and our power flows though our very veins. Over the centuries, as we grow older, our powers evolve naturally without much concern for study.

Perhaps some of you, while not familiar with the term 'djinn', know us by our English name, 'genie.' That name may get you thinking about stories of people who live in bottles and grant wishes. To set the record straight, most of us do not live in bottles (at least not full time), although it is quite possible for us to do so. We can create our own little pocket dimension in there, and some djinni bottles are quite large and fancy on the inside, almost like a palace. However, being trapped inside a bottle, no matter how large and nice the inside may be, gets boring after a while. Most of us prefer roaming about. As for granting wishes... well, those of us who have the power to do so (and not all djinn do) are usually very selective about who we grant them to.

So where did the djinn come from? Legends say that while mankind was created of earth, and angels of pure light, the djinn were created of smokeless fire. We possess free will, just like humans do. We have children, but not nearly as often as mortals, since our lives are quite long, spanning many centuries. It is said that there are more djinn than humans, but we have never bothered to actually count. Most of us are invisible to mortal eyes, living in sort of a realm parallel to the human world. Some of us never take solid form, instead acting as spirits to either protect and help humans, or cause trouble for them. When we do take a form that humans can see, this form can vary widely. Most of us can shapeshift and create illusions, so when you meet a djinn be aware that some things may not be what they seem.

The djinn are divided up into different tribes, the largest ones being the Marid, the Ifrit, the Jann, the Shaitan, the Jinn, and the Ghul. I could write a whole other article explaining the differences between these tribes, but for now I will simply say that we are of many different shapes, and many different tempers. No two djinn are exactly alike.

I do hope I have clarified some things for the people of Ireem. Salaam, and safe travels to you.

-Nakira of the Jann, Djinn leader.

I recieved this story today from Dungeon Guard Dalilah Sirnah, a wonderfully delightful individual who everyone should have the opportunity to be tied up by at least once in thier lives. (I'm still waiting for my chance...) It seems that Ireem's own Grandpa Wong got himself into a bit of trouble, as detailed below...

WongFei was slammed up onto the auction block today by Anne. I watched as different male preys started bidding on him immediately. Curious to see the outcome I stayed and watched the slaver leader get bid on. Knight Krist was bidding curiously high on Wong, I wonder what his plans would be? Anne admitted to me she is jealous of Wong's new wife Marylin, is that why she put him up there? Whatever the reason, more began to gather around Wong ...bidding as he made he snide yet funny comments. He showed no fear. Soon Kadar the Guard, my brother, came and bid highest but Knight Krist outbid him.... so they glared at each other a bit bidding back and forth. I wish I had my money on me that moment, Wong would have looked great dancing naked in my dungeon for all the ladies of Ireem. In the end a male prey named Jasbert Kidd took Wong by outbidding everyone at only k$310. Wong, the well known Slaver Leader, is now a Slaves Slave. Jas claims Wong is a gift to someone, but who knows. I have seen it all today. =)

-Dalilah Sirnah

EDITORIAL NOTE FROM SAGE: Some of you may recall that during the slaver election, I firmly supported Jasbert for the position of Slaver Leader. As we can see from today's events, this has come to pass - it may have taken longer than expected, but the right candidate for the job finally won. No offense to Mr. Wong, of course....

Today it was announced that during Owner Tre Marjeta's vacation, Ireem's own teal-haired hyperactive bouncing girl Sage Rosenfeld will be taking over management of the Ireem Chronicles. The Kingdom trembled at the news, with the Queen of the Undead herself stepping forward to take personal responsibility for keeping the catacomb-delver out of trouble, and that smoking hot redhead slaver Chantalle Atlass offering to use her whip to keep the silly girl in line. When I asked myself for a reaction, I said: "Managing the Ireem Chronicles for Mistress Tre is an awesome respo... resp.... amount of power.... right... and I'd be remiss if I didn't find some way to abuse it horribly... err, I mean use it for the good of Ireem. *pause* Are we on the record?"

After a pause while Sage went to get a drink of water, she continued. "I've heard the people's concerns that the Chronicles may not uphold the same ridiculously unbelievable journalistic standards that it does while Mistress Tre is in charge. Rest assured that every article we post will be lovingly fabricated only with my... I mean the Kingdom's... best interests at heart."

Finally, I asked myself for any final words. "Be good to each other out there, people. Whether you're a knight, a citizen, a predator, or slaver/magi/bedouin/guard/djinn/undead, there's still alot of sand out there."

I have no idea what I meant by that, but maybe time will tell. Or not.


Don't Miss the Live Event of the Week

*Are you Bedu? Are you prey?
Come join the party on Saturday*

At 2pm slt on Staurday 22nd, there will be a party to celebrate Jonathan Moriarty's victory in the Bedu leadership contest. Venue is the Ship Inn, just above the port in the middle of the South wall of the city

*Slavers, Djinn, Magi, Knights,
Come get pissed and have a fight*

As long as you don't fight in the Inn, everyone is welcome. Captain Wong organised sparring contests on the docks for his party. Will jonathan go one better????

*Get your kit off, have a dance,
Try to pull, come take a chance*

Did you see Elder stripping at the last party? Were you focussed more on Sage and Tre? Why not show the other citizens of Ireem that you are hot, hot, hot and emote a better dance this time. If you don't show 'em what you got then they won't chase you.

Drinks and food will be supplied compliments of the Ship Inn. Entertainments will also be provided. Come one, come all and see if there is anything special....

*Don't be dull and stay away,
Come one, come all, come on and play*

Today is KILL ALL SLAVERS day!!!!!! anyone reading this who is not a slaver kill them! just for today hehehe. and if you are a knight, find a reason =).


Now that the Assassin is dead and I no longer fear for myself being 'kidnapped' again, I can tell a tale of woe, and hope that my tale carries over to the other poor, innocent girls out there.

There was a day, not to distant in the future, when my Master was battling a dungeon guard, the very same guard now renowned for his capture and killing of the assassin. My Master needed food..and took off for some, while I was standing watching this matching of sword strength, sadly..the instant my Masters back was turned, this man...let's call him Kadar, grabbed me harshly by the arms and dragged me forcibly to the dungeon, literally tossing me down the stairs in his haste to get to his own safe harbor.

As I stood there in shock, having no way to let my Master or anyone know where I was, all I could do was stare at this man who dared kidnap an owned girl from just within the palace walls, for what he described as "pure torturous evil" as he was to flay the flesh off my body until I gave him the answers he was seeking in his quest for finding the assassin.

Luckily, my Master and two magi did show up, I am not sure what happened, at that point I had been backhanded so viciously so many times that my ears were ringing and the inside of my mouth tasting of blood from the cutting of my teeth into my inner cheeks, but I do know I was set free, with no further damage done to my body, only the embarassment of having been dragged to the dungeon still fresh in my mind.

I extend a very warm thank you to the two magi who came with my Master, KCEE and Skip, and did whatever it is magi do to calm down a situation, and my Master for whatever he did to win my freedom...but I'd like us all to take some time and reflect that maybe being owned...is not safe harbor from being kidnapped by anyone in Ireem and to keep a secure watch over your shoulders no matter what direction you may face in the sands!

- Tre

Assassin captured in Kerri’s office

The Assasin has been captured.. last night while on patrol city guard Kadar Jayaram and the Magi Skip spotted a hooded figure going into the Healer Lady Kerri’s office. The Guard investigated and was attacked upon enter the office.

In a running street battle Jailer Drako Sirnah and Kight Urso Kronsage helped attack the Killer.

Once captured the hood was removed and shocked that it was a woman. In fact is was the slaver Cae Vella.

The girl was taken to the dungeon by the guards and confessed to wanting to kill Kerri for interfering in her plans to assisinate the Sultana.

From the official palace records: Caeldyn Vella: "She was not going to be still living for my next attempt on the Sultana's life... I had to stop her....was soooo close... so so close....."

She was angry at Kerri’s foiling of the first plot of the poison tea. And she was going to kill her to her to get her out of the way.

The girl confessed her motive for killing the Sultana…

From the official records:

Caeldyn Vella: "YEssss, my motive you waste of skin! I am to be rich! Killing the Sultana would send the state into a whirlwind of chaos... the knights would scramble and fall and the slavers would rise and rule"

With a full confession the prisoner tried to escape from her locked jail cell and was put to death.

Kadar Jayaram: with one quick blow, he kills the girl leaving her body for the rats
“yes much better this way”

Caeldyn Vella falls, blood pooling around her body, seeping into the straw on the floor of the cell and cooling as her body drained... her last image his face, glaring down at her

As recorded by a loyal palace servant, this crises is over the Assassin is dead…

Long Live the Sultana….

The honorable slaver Raychelle is about to become a knight for a week, due to her actions of keeping Bik under her cruel domination and almost allowing Storm to rape her outside the palace gates.

Bik has cap'd her and has decided as punishment she will become a Knight for one week and act in her most honorable way to help the Knights in their duty and actions.

More to follow, one week of watching Bik try to keep Ray under control....can she do it??

- Tre

CODE OF CONDUCT for the Knighthood of Ireem

Last updated: 11/08/2008

The Knighthood of Ireem is an elite group of honorable soldiers. It is not for everyone. Our mission is to protect the weak and innocent, to assure peace in the kingdom, and see that justice is maintained.


The current leader of the Knights is Dream Questi. The leader is responsible to decide policy, mediate disputes within the ranks, designate Senior Knights, and to execute the policy. The leader is the guardian of our honor.

Senior Knights are chosen by the leader to help administrate and execute policy. When the leader is not available, the Seniors should be deferred to for issues of leadership. Our Seniors at this time are: Dano (most senior), Seraf, Camell, Kazuma.


A knight is an admirable example of honor and loyalty, first and foremost. Respect is the second quality of a Knight; all knights will respect each other, the citizens, and even our enemies. We follow a higher standard.

1) The Knighthood of Ireem is an Order, and military, and therefor all obey a hierarchy of authority.

2) Knights do not initiate combat, except in certain circumstances, as detailed below.

3) Knights may not keep slaves, except as a temporary condition as a result of bargaining for that slave's freedom. Knights may have a voluntary squire or page.

4) Torture or abuse of captives, other than to keep control of them, is forbidden.

5) Knights will respect safe zones, and will not fight or push within them.

6) Generally, Knights fight and kill only when there is a good reason in role play to do so. Seeing aggressive behavior in the city or our camp, is sufficient reason for Kill On Sight. Unwelcome intrusion into the Knight's camp is sufficient to initiate combat. In addition if a knight had been captured by a pred group and not given there freedom (i.e. slavers, undead, etc) you may attack members of that pred group on sight so that we have someone to trade for the captive knights release. Kill On Sight orders may be given by the Leader or Seniors.

7) Knights must ask a Prey if they want help in order to interfere with a capture. No answer, or a 'no', means we may not interfere.

8) Once a Prey is captured, they are the property of the Captor, a Knight may not simply attack the Captor, ask the slave if they wish to be free. If they do then you must first Bargain or debate with the Captor, but if they refuse to render the Prey up then you may challenge them for the Preys freedom, if you loose you must let them pass. (when doing this make it clear that the winer is to free the looser at no cost}

9) Honor requires that we use civil language at all times.

10) A knight may challenge anyone to a duel, which is formal combat, except another Knight. If you have a problem with a brother or sister's conduct, take it to the leader or Seniors. An exception is that if you see a Knight torture a captive, you are to stop them immediately.

11) The desert is a harsh environment, so it is no loss of honor to flee a battle when you are about to die.

12) Above all, Knights must inspire confidence, trust , and respect in the population.

Ser Dano Wylie Knight Templar


It has just been reported to me, by the groom, that WongFei and Marylin have been married, please take a moment and extend your congratulations to the happy couple!


I've been told that the Knights have decided to name the hill by the Bedouin camp "Knights Hill", challengers to this title can see the knights, but for now..they claim it as theirs.

- Tre

Knights Lexxi and Jordina accompanied by Guard Ennas, Prey Dinky, and others stole Wong's famous wine today from his camp while he was out, then after getting wasted ran to the bedu camp only to find more alcohol. Pictures available. Also a drunken camel was present too.


Chantalle Atlass, one of the queens of fashion in Ireem is leaving the slavers!!

You heard it here, first!

For reasons yet to be released or where she is going, she has announced this to me today, will the slavers be able to keep her in their camp, or let her go, knowing she helped forge the paths they are taking these days. She has been spotted in both the Bedu camp and the combs...new paths to be found?

- Tre


It's been brought to my attention by the healer..and no, it wasn't MJ who started this, but another..who I can not mention at this time.

It seems there's an outbreak of gonorrhea in the city..symptoms and cure will be listed below, be -sure- and see Kerri immediately if you experience any of the following!

Itching, burnining during urination, drippage of pus from the penis, vagial discharge that is not normal, bleeding, pain. Symptoms can also occur in the anal or throat regions.
If any pain or specifically burning is noticed, one must be treated immediately and abstain from sexual practices.
Tincture and cream 3x daily, oatmeal bath as needed

It seems to be spreading fast, this mysterious rash that causes itching and no sexual relations for 3 days, if you start to itch in your nether regions, be sure to see Kerri for a full exam! She has the balm to cure this, but you must apply it quickly, and keep applying it for 3 full days.

I hear it's now affecting Storm Bejris, the slaver, and I have to ask..have he and MasterJ had illicit relations? The question begs to be answered! Please see an overheard conversation below...

Storm Berjis: Hey, i do my beast
MasterJ Swashbuckler: no wonder all the camels are lame...

Woe to anyone who gets this..make sure you ask Kerri for a full exam!

- Tre

Slaves are knights?

Ever since Storm and his weak following slavers decided to rampage the knights and take them as prisoner all of the sudden the normally seen around "slaves" and "prey" have swords now and are knights? .... sigh.....


Ladies, ladies, ladies.... the charming MasterJ must be avoided at all costs due to his extensive horny moments. He was overheard talking to our Healer about a mysterious rash in...that area. Be careful no too catch it!


Mora Lewinter, Ireem's new seamstress, would like to offer her products for purchase.

She has purchased some beautiful navy blue silk and currently has two outfits available.

During her first week of business she will be giving away a free matching belly jewel with every purchase.

Please contact Mora LeWinter for pictures of her work, they are beautiful and flowing silks.

Some prey run and some prey flee, calling for help.

If you are a runner and do not call for help from the knights, then take your capture with dignity!
If the predators beat you, fair and square, then do not bewail to the knights to come free you and
fight for your release! The time to beg for help is not when kneeling in defeat, but when you are
being chased across the sands. You bring shame upon the group of prey by whining, yes whining!
about your own choice and lack of skill.

Knights are willing to help and often ask if you need help when they see you being chased. If in
your pride of skill you deny them their ability to help, that is fine and should be respected by
them. To do this means you are telling that knight you are fine with being captured. Most prey
are very athletic and can outrun the predators. However, if you cannot outrun them and cannot reach
a safe zone, do NOT blame the knights for not helping you. If they ask the predator to release you
and the predator doesn't, there is nothing they can do. You are legally property of the predator
when you are captured. For a knight to attack a predator to enable your release is wrong and, in
fact, against the law. And you, prey, are wrong for asking for help at that late stage, when it
can only frustrate the knights.


It seems that the assassin of old has returned, he goes by the name " light Bravin", if you know of him or his whereabouts, please let the dungeon keepers or a knight know immediately.

He's been seen mainly around the physician's place of business, seemingly willing to stalk Kerri constantly, having a thing for her is my assumption.

Let's not let our fair Kerri fall into his hands or his whims, and keep the sultana safe, please, watch for this man, let's put this issue to rest.

- Tre

I heard today there was a Knight round-up by the slavers, led by their new leader Wong, Cae and Storm were two who were very in the middle of this, last I heard they were neck and neck with 2 captures each. What is the meaning of this? Does anyone know? Why would the slavers go after the knights instead of prey for selling or using? It confuses lil' ol me, but if you've a clue, let me know. Could it be they would rather spar than run?

- Tre

It seems that all the preds want to own a knight now since Dream's rescue. Knight LegendKiller was taken by the slaver Sexxi and eventually turned slaver. Then poor Knight Chatomen was taken by her and still to this day has not been freed, yet still alive with his bruises visible. Sexxi's well known brother Jaime took Knight Lexxi for a bit until she was kidnapped by an undead, whom has quite an eye for her, while she was left unattended walking around the desert still heartbroken from a mysterious unnamed Knight. And yet after all that Sexxi is at it again with her lates capture Knight Confluence. So is she to blame for starting this overwhelming trend? Will all the knights be freed? Is this mysterious undead falling for Knight Lexxi? Will Chato EVER go home? Will Sexxi ever stop taking Knights? I think the Knights need to step it up a notch and get a little mean. There are so many unanswered questions that will be revealed slowly. Ireem is changing rapidly. And is it just me or is the well known Prey "SugarKane" looking a little pale?


Why do you feel you would make a good Magi Leader?

*Petertron Nieuport: The Magi need an archmage that understands the going ons of the Magical world. As someone who has gazed unto the ur-vortex for the past few years, I feel a strong feeling of comprehension of the arcane and occult mysteries. As such, I also feel I understand the fabric of magic that the Magi interact with, and all the strange forces that effect it as such. But that is just the fundamental platform I stand on. I have been active in the community, and have worked with the undead community with a number of issues. Finally, I strongly feel the Magi have been in the background in the political arena far too long. With our talents, knowledge, and skill, it is a shame that we are so underrepresented and inactive. I aim to change this by strengthening the unity of the Magi, and applying this unity to a number of issues.

*Skip Thespian: I am a sorcerer of the first class. I will draw the Magi together and lead them into a new dawn of peaceful co-existance with others. We are here to aid those who ask...and influence the future of Ireem.

*Anneliese Wolfenhaut: I am creative, and can help a group come up with all sorts of mayhem. Of course, I would not do this, now that I am magi and not Undead. I wouldn't dream of causing trouble around Ireem. The people of Ireem should be aware that I would never do anything bad or above reproach. I can be trusted.

*Marilyn Breen: I have competence in alchemy, spell casting and potions

What is it you have to offer your tribe that the others going against you may not have?

*Petertron Nieuport: Ireem was built upon unholy ground, hence the existence of the undead and other strange phenomena. In my studies, I have learned a great amount about the history of this place, and what must be done to maintain the balance of power. Otherwise, dark horrible things would slip from the seams of reality, devouring mind, soul, and matter with horrific black tentacles that rot away at the very substance of time and space itself. The Magi must act as the caretakers of this city, keeping the darkness at bay. I also believe we should hold regular bake sales, and start offering intro to Magic classes, and even organize community support to help solve some of the fundamental problems with the city.

*Skip Thespian: I am a sorcerer with deep knowledge of the occult. I have more than 40 kills, and have no fear of defeat. I know how to lead men and women into battle with victorious results. I have strong mind and quick wit, and understand the essence of politics.

*Anneliese Wolfenhaut: I have experience as an Undead, and am very efficient in turning them human. Which most in Ireem are happy to see done, of course. Fewer monsters makes for a safer city. I tend to be good at recruiting, and increase numbers, and organizing what we have, as well.

I also have many good friends in other groups, and have experience planning actions which involve all of Ireem. (Remember, the Sultana was PROTECTED by the Magi, and avoided assassination!)

I also tend to throw really fun parties, and if I am elected, we will have a big bash in the tower, and show you some tricks.

Unlike some of the other candidates, I am completely good and would never do anything bad. The people of Ireem should know this. I can be trusted.

*Marilyn Breen: Experience

Do you have goals for the Magi, something that will give them an idea of what is in store for them with you at the helm?

*Petertron Nieuport: Organization. The Magi are a loosely tied group of academics, sorcerers, and seers, many with great talent, but due to the nature of the beast, they are scattered to the wind. I intend to bring all Magi under my cloak into a unified order of the Magi, which will organize to deal with some of the problems, and work to ensure the safety and general health of all Ireem's citizens. I also intend to institute a general health care plan which will make sure all members of the Magi are kept in good health and protected from all sorts of magical maladies.

*Skip Thespian: All can expect that the Magi will learn to work together to help make our group strong once more. I will develop the overall strength and character of the Magi organization in this fair city. To be a magi will again be a badge of honor.

*Anneliese Wolfenhaut: I should like all the magi to compile our knowledge. To record potions, spells, and rituals, so we may share them between ourselves, and increase the powers of all of us.

I should also like the magi to have more involvement with the palace, of course. This is a priority, in my opinion, as our Dear Sultana is in need of assistance, and, if I may be so bold as to say it, perhaps guidance.

Did I mention I told her fortune for her yesterday?

Of couse, the Sultana has nothing to fear from me. The people of Ireem should know, I would never do anything bad, and I can be trusted.

*Marilyn Breen: I would love the magi to be more organized and carry out events with good role play in them

The magi area pretty secretive group, is that the way it is going to be in the future, or are there plans for bringing them more out into the public eye?

*Petertron Nieuport: Yes. As I said earlier, the Magi are a loose and unorganized group that suffers from a great amount of in-fighting. I intend to organize the Magi to more productive ends where we can give back to the community and use as many Magi as possible to promote an organized agenda that benefits Ireem. While the secrets of the Magi will more or less be kept to ourselves, there is no reason why we can't give back to the community that has allowed us to stay here.

*Skip Thespian: We shall be in the public eye, very visably walking the streets of Ireem! Our mission may not always be clear to outsiders, I cannot deny that.

*Anneliese Wolfenhaut: Magi are always willing to help, and more and more we are interacting with other groups in Ireem. And you need not know our secrets in order to benefit from the good we do. No doubt, you have already been affected by our good works, you just perhaps do not realize in all the ways we have changed your life.

Remember, too, that the Magi mean no harm, we do good for all. And we can be trusted.

*Marilyn Breen: the plan is to bring them more on the open but keeping the secrets on their practises

I hear it rumored often that the Magi and Djinn are basically the same, how could you help to quiet those words from the folks of Ireem?

*Petertron Nieuport: Believing such a rumor is silly. It's like saying the slavers are the same as the knights because they both use swords. Both Magi and Djinn use magic, but their natures are very dissimilar- Magi are practitioners of the arcane arts, Djinn are elemental beings.

*Skip Thespian: Magi are the more serious magic users. We study and write books, study methodology, compound potions, write spells, and have regular classes as well as tame wild magic and use innate ability.

*Anneliese Wolfenhaut: Djinn are demonic, not human. They are unpredictable. Magi, as highly educated humans, are rational beings.

Djinn torture those they capture for some sick pleasure of their own, or out of dark need. Magi, if we torture, do it in the name of education and learning.

So the people of Ireem really need not fear us; whatever we do to them is done for the good of alll. The magi can be trusted.

*Marilyn Breen: we don't need to quiet any voice

Magic has a very strong pull, tell me...do the Magi ever enslave by trickery and deceipt? And is there anything you could do to help stop that?

*Petertron Nieuport: Individual Magi may use a number of methods to enslave individuals, but my official stance and the stance of the Magi order is that we do what we can to respect the local law. Under my rule, however, we will attempt to stomp out any such behavior when possible, but due to the hard times, people will do whatever they can to make some extra coin. It is the duty of the knights to enforce the laws of Ireem.

*Skip Thespian: Never have we, to my knowlege, enslaved anyone! Not that, in the past, there may have been some who have done so, but not under my leadership will this happen. And to stop it should I determine it is happening well, let's just say that i am persuasive.

*Anneliese Wolfenhaut: Trickery? We do not resort to trickery, so the people of Ireem need not concern themselves with that question.

We mean only good, and the people of Ireem should know that we can be truested.

*Marilyn Breen: Magi should enslave by that!!! Our power is not in the swords mainly but in the ability to use the powers the spirits give us

If you are elected, what will be your first plan of action as Magi leader?

*Petertron Nieuport: Well, I myself will go down to the tavern and buy a round of drinks for everybody there. Then I might laugh maniacally, as is the time honored tradition of a Magi when he receives power. But after that, I intend to call a meeting of the Magi, so we can discuss plans to organize and work together. Furthermore, I hope to enact my Magi registration plan, which will create a census of all Magi, so that they can be utilized more efficiently, for both law enforcement and community causes.

*Skip Thespian: To unite the Magi as one.

*Anneliese Wolfenhaut: To meet with the magi, individually, and find out what their personal goals are, what they wish to contribute to Ireem, and what they wish to learn.

Then meet as a group, and plan future actions.

Of course, this would not involve any mayhem or tumult.

The people of Ireem should know that I will only do good, and I can be trusted.

*Marilyn Breen: Organizing the tower better than it is right now

Final words before I publish this?

*Petertron Nieuport: The Magi are in dire need of direction. I bring this to the table. I feel my opponents lack the skill at organization and the knowledge to take the Magi in the direction where we can really create some change. Please vote for me, your vote will not be in vain.

*Skip Thespian: I am simply the most powerful and well known magi in the kingdom I am friends with powerful people. A vote for me is a vote for Magi strength and unity.

*Marilyn Breen: Spirits of the Seven Winds
Keepers of the powers
Transporters of knowledge, wisdom and truth
Guardians of the earth, sea and sky
Hear this pleading of a wayward traveler
Grant me audience before thine eyes and ears
That thus this may be heard
And my needs be seen.
Those who fear thee—seek me
Those who thou dost loathe—abhor me
In thy path, I wish to walk
And with thy voice I desire to talk
Clothe my bones with the strength of thy strengths
Fortify my mind with thine solid foundation
Gathered from the expanse of the universe
And carried by thine able hands
That in thy wisdom and truth
And through the purity of your spirit
These things may be imparted unto me.
Spirits of the Seven Winds hear my cry
And let this thus be so.

It was brought to my attention today that during an auction of a male slave, a knight stood around mocking him to further his humiliation, not even bothering to offer help as is generally what the knights do.

Have we been left as citizens/prey to simply be mocked by the knights if it is their whim? I will not release this knights name at this time,suffice it to say I was there to watch this happen, with my own eyes, and I do not doubt for a second that this knight in question would definitely be one I would not want to try and help me, they would more than likely toss me to the sand and laugh at my embarassment as they mocked and rediculed me for their own pleasure.

- Tre

It seems that a certain slaver, Ben, and his slave, Selena, were seen entering the palace healer's place of business and pillaging it to pieces. They also got so lucky as to see the sexy Lady half dressed as her bath was interrupted, which could not have put her in a very good mood, we know how much we ladies like our baths.

What could they possibly have been after? This is something I could not get out of the kind healer, as that's patient confidentiality and all. But, I have been told that they were so desperate for this item that they ransacked her office and equipment to find it, finally being arrested by the dungeon keepers.

I hear the slaver has had his legs broken...correct me if I am wrong please, but with two broken legs..he's going to be one easy slaver to take advantage of. His life should have been taken, but Kerri did beg for it to be spared, sometimes one must wonder if she's too kind hearted for this fine city of ours.

Will Slaver Ben pay Kerri back in gratitude for having his life spared? Or will he seek retribution for her having summoned help upon seeing the state of her office, glass broken and shelves crashed, it will take her a long time to get this fixed I am sure.

- Tre

Water... bewitches and beguiles

Solemn music of the angel isle

Harmony of shingle sifting foam between it's scales

Rhythm of the ebb and flow, weaves patterns in the shale

Melody stands, high on wave and crashes down below the saline curve

Rises with the coming storm and leaps from foamy tip to sky, observe

A figure far beyond the azure bay

Merrow harp sings sadly to the silent day

And all this in her eyes, her form, her hands

reflects her earthly cadence to the distant land.

Kahdoosch 2008


Is it true? Is there really a mermaid in the bay? One who sings a siren song of longing and desire? Who disappears often when discovered? I'd love to know this. How incredible would that be, Ireem's very own, personal mermaid. I'd post a poem here if I had permission to..but the one who sent it to me would need to give me that....*grin*

- Tre

Is this the Assasin?

Last night, after being accosted by Storm and his slave, the Palace had another set of visitors. This time I had to sneak down from the harem when the shuffling of drawers was heard. Sitting in the Sultana’s throne was a very darkly dressed small woman with a very raspy voice accompanied by a slave. The slave was rummaging through the compartments and drawers and I heard her say excitedly, “I found it”!

I immediately and directly confronted the burglars reminding them of the value of their heads! This dark creature walks up to me, cutting off her own finger and saying “what’s a body part or two, nothing you or the Sultana can do can hurt me” She let out a demons giggle that surprised me! My first thought was to immediately slay this defiling demon but how? My own small and slight stature is a challenge with the scimitar and I saw with my own eyes her personal amputation.

The creature told me she was thousands of years on this land and called me a stupid mortal. I suddenly felt my power and my spirit being pulled from me, being sucked into the dark little creature and becoming bound to her when suddenly…Kaydar rushes in with his scimitar at the ready. He demands, “What are you doing here? The throne is off limits”. Seeing my predicament, Kaydar slashes at the hooded creature but she sifts like sand between his weapons passes. The dark one departed saying words that I can never repeat much less understand.

A search of the slave revealed nothing but I believe they wee searching for a talisman of the Sultana’s to bring on her a spell.

In my haste however, I was not able to get either of their names. I hope the Sultana will forgive my momentary lapse of diplomacy and somehow reward Kaydar for his loyalty.

A humble citizen in service to the Sultana

Jenny of the Undead was spotted near the city dwellings last night by Kadar the city guard.
He was sure she was up to no good and perhaps even trying to captures a citizen...
He arrested her and brought her to the dungeon of the city. He tried to convince the girl to talk and give up the secrets of the undead but she was loyal and would not... the guard used methods that can not be discussed in this paper but still the girl would not talk. One the undead had heard of the girls arrest, they rushed the dungeon in mass and forced Kadar to free her.. She is recovering from her wounds with her family in the catacombs.

*You unfold a rather dirty pamphlet with almost illegible handwriting and an image of a scrawny Magi wearing a fur coat hugging children. Looking closer you see that the children are wrong, one has six fingers, the other has no eyes, and the little girl giving him flowers has a third leg. The flowers are also nettles.*

Vote Petertron Nieuport for Magi leader

In 200 years, the world will come to an end. Peter knows this, and will do everything in his power to prevent such a horrific catastrophe from happening before its time. Furthermore, he has a firmly fundamentalist stance on all the major Magi issues, such as Spell control, hypnotism, and arcane restructuring. He also has a history with working with the city on major political and government issues, and is involved with the community, and under his watch, the Magi library gained a entirely new section of books, labeled, "Tomes of horrific evil."

Always a firm believer in Magi rights, he puts the Magi first, quoting the mad Arab Abdul Alhazred, "The arcane ones shall bring forth the dark ones, and begin the dark ascension of the great Azathoth." Peter was also seen at several major events, or at least several kilometers away, cowering from the sun. He also has read most of the books in the Magi library, and is well liked by one of his parents.

If elected, Peter promises to place the Magi first, and work to bring forth the dark ones at the exact time when they are prophesied to come. He will also create a Magi registration system that involves a certain level of organization the part of the Magi, and will do all he can to create peace between the undead and the above world, seeing the soulless as simply misunderstood gentle creatures with a penchant for torture. He is also well liked by children, as you can see by the picture.

In fact, other members of the Kingdom have found themselves feeling a sudden bout of Peter-mania, after meeting this young, charismatic Magi.

Opponent Magi Anneliese Wolfenhaut had this to say, “Peter? Peter? Let me tell you about Peter. *the next chunk of text is scribbled out* Peter is a fine candidate, and I am honored to be running for him. While I would just do stupid things like paint the tower of Magi pink and cry into my pillow every night, Peter might actually do something cool. Also, you shouldn't vote for me, because I would mess everything up and cry about it.”

Knight and Peter fan Camell Uggla had this to say, “Peter is the chosen one... You must vote for him... He is handsome and perfect in every way, and I would give my all to support him in this election... Also, don't vote for Severus... he smells of kitten death and afterbirth... YES THEE CAN!” While she said this, her state was so full of Peter mania that her eyes were fully glazed over, her pupils fully dilated, a sure sign of the recent rash of Peter mania that has been overtaking the town.

Also, after it being revealed that Skip is actually terminally ill by special Peter spell-analysis, voting for Skip will be a vote for the undead agenda. No matter how much Skip denies this fact, he is dying. And will become an undead. You don't want an undead in the tower of Magi, do you? If we have an undead in the tower of Magi, they might be permitted to watch our children, and if they watch our children, we might have undead children. The undead agenda is wrong, and must be prevented. You wouldn't want a horrible zombie child, would you? Peter would, but you don't. Vote for Peter.

Also, none of the other candidates showed up to Peter's special debates, which he held in the middle of the desert at 3am. This shows that they are unreliable, and cannot be trusted. Peter, however, did a moving speech about his personal history, his relationship with his parents, his strained relationship with his siblings, and his favorite books. The insects in attendance were all wooed.

Vote Peter in this election, it is the only logical choice that does not result in death and horror, at least for 200 years. If you vote otherwise, your loved ones will die horribly, your pets will get syphillis and die, and your potted plants will become self aware and try to strangle you in your sleep. In fact, hand this pamphlet off to 10 other people, or your hair will all fall out, but if you hand it off to 20 people, you will receive a bigger bust size or a free copy of Peter's inspiring autobiography, “Life is a pointless walk to the eternal void.” So, remember to vote Peter, he represents Change.

Nowhere is it Safe…

Tonight, while wandering around the palace, I heard a man’s voice coming from the harem. Cautiously and quietly, I went upstairs to the harem and found the slaver Storm Berjis (whom I recognized from one of the auctions) smooth talking a slave girl (whose name I will not reveal to protect her). As small as I am, I confronted the trespasser but found a great problem in drawing the scimitar that is nearly as big as I am and almost as heavy. Stepping from the shadows, I spoke to ask how they got in. Lie after lie he told me trying to say he was a knight and that he was really Arian Clip and that the knights were here to take over the city in the name of their god.

As best I can remember the conversation went like this;

“How did you get in here?” I asked as the tall ruggedly handsome man just grinned back at me tapping his rope and it’s hook. “You know the penalty for being here” I said? “What’s the penalty” he replied as he scanned the room for others besides the little woman confronting him. With that, he drew his sword smiling, “Yell and I slice your throat woman” He snorted back. Then with his free hand he uncoiled his rope and handed it to the slave girl saying “Set that on the wall ledge slave”. “Yes master” was her reply. “The Sultana will have your head” I said indignantly only to hear him say, “She may try woman” as he heartily laughed.

Then the most remarkable conversation ensued where in his smooth talking and threats I knew for certain he was the trespassing slaver. He tried repeatedly to lie his way out of this situation and then resorted to threats while insinuating the knights were about to kill all of the citizens….

The lying man who was a slaver says, “Do you know who I am or what group is mine? I am a Knight and my name is Arian Clip. Us knights are on a mission here.....and this city will be ours. With that comment and in laughter, he exhibited his long, straight sword and slapped my cheek with it.

“You are not a Knight; you are a Slaver and trespassing. I can tell by the whip on your belt you devil do not lie to me, I am a seer, I know what you are”. I said coyly. “That mean nothing to me, I swear that I am a knight, on the cross and on Jesus Christ, Son of God”. He snickered back. I retorted back half screaming, “I will not be fooled, my djinn blood of my mother tells me you lie”!

He rolled his eyes back and said, “Djinn.....VADE RETRO SATANAS! In nomine pater et fili et sancti” he then did a swift sign of cross and kissed his blade...."help me God"
“I will return you to the ninth circle of hell, the place from where you belong”! “Shoo” I said raising my voice. “We, knights have now a reason to burn this city to the ground” he replied once again claiming to be a knight. “You are a devil now go from here” I replied evidently persuasively.

“I'll come back with the crusaders; soon your head will adorn the walls!! Blasphematory mouthy diable…Jesus.......Lead my hand..." lunges toward the evil beast, aiming at her heart" without waiting the result, the intruder swiftly turns his heels and run to the opening, jumping over the wall and shouting in his fall, “KNIGHTS,BROTHERS IN FAITH, THERE IS A DEMON IN THE PALACE !!!!”

These were not the words of a knight but of the slaver Storm Berjis… fortunately for me, no harm was done except for the insults to both the knights and her majesty the Sultana. But now, I tremble in fear.


It has been brought to my attention by an anonymous source that there seems to be a Dungeon Master with a very unnatural affinity for the undead, doing all he can to capture them and use them for his own sick, twisted pleasures....truth or not...this would bear looking into.

- Tre

I was doing what I always do, standing near the auction and throwing rocks and insults at slavers. It was a unusualy quiet night in Ireem. Storm finally decided he'd had enough and caught me stripped me naked, and proceeded to chain me like a animal. I was then gaged (I was biting him) and after taking a brutal beating, and still not submitting he cut my throat and cast me aside like a orange peel. When he threw me away to gasp my last breath I gathered my last ounce of consciousness and crawled to the stairs and tumbled down them and blacked out.

I do not know how long I was out, I do remember though waking I know not when in the land of the bright realm of the Djinn for a mere moment before passing out again. I do not know who saved me, i never saw more than a shadow, but I thank them. The next thing I remember was waking up at the foot of the oasis under the shade of a camel.

Fortunately, I am as well as I can be. The scar is barely noticeable due to magic I would guess, and my bruises have faded. I do notice some changes though. I like celery now where I did not before, and everything tastes like the color orange... And the muttering voices I hear now at the edges of my mind interrupt my sleep.

The most shocking part of this whole thing is that while I was being brutalized I was no more than 10 feet from TWO knights, who did nothing. Did not even look my way or speak a word to offer help. I could not call out for help as I was gagged, but had they merely looked over they would have seen I was begging for help, desperately trying to get away.

I am appalled at the route the knights have taken as of late and until now I did not even believe these rumors were true. I hope someone else doesn't have to die (or nearly) for someone to remind them hat their purpose for being, and being here is. If a prey cannot even depend on a knight to save her at her most desperate moment, when in and easy swords reach no less, there is no longer any hope in this desolate place.

To whoever becomes the knight leader I hope you will work on re-training your knights on the codes of chivalry and their vow to protect the weak.


What a blast, not many sent me info on it, but I was able to be there for about an hour, in the midst of some of the sexiest flesh in Ireem, dancing, laughter, some sparring of words, lots of fun, which was as it should be on party night, I won't write about personal stuff, cause like...that's personal, but if folks -wish- to send in their take on the party, I will publish it, I just can't write it myself.

- Tre

Guard Kadar arrested for the Torture of a Knight...

Kadar claims he was just doing his job to find the corrupt knights metioned in this very paper.

Copper arrested him in the sands and brought him to face his accusser... A very pretty Knight whose name we need to keep secret..

He might be placed on trial...

Copper said that Jailers are not to torture innocent people on a whim.

The very kind Kerri was able to save the life of Kadar with her potions of life.

Through a new magic found in faraway lands, the spirit of many residents was captured yesterday Newly uploaded is the festival of Wong Fei, nothing rehearsed here, call it a docuday at the Kingdom of Sand!


I hope you enjoy it

From an anonymous source:

"I was witness to the undead Aizen, in the cafe tricking a few slave's, Jenny Saintlouis and Sundance Teardrop, to coming to the catacombs and becoming his in lure of their freedom from being used and abused by other Masters's his words of "Then I offer you now..true freedom..to be on the winning side...to stand against these creatures..who only beat and rape their victims!". He promised them kind treatment and their freedom to come and go as they please and foolish girls as they are follw with these words " Jenny Saintlouis, Sings we're gonna be free" Sundance Teardrop:" i have no choice sister....i cant let her go down alone ...and besides he talks of freedom!"

- Tre

It was a beautiful night in Ireem, The stars were shining and twinkling in the night sky..light breeze carressing , whispering sweet nothings......the sound of swords clashing in the distance, it was a lively night.

unable to fight ( i had killed my Master *he didnt call when he said he would.. or was it when he left the toilet seat up*... he in turn, cap'd me .. back to the story) i helplessly watched as my Husband and the Knight named Bobo clashed.. the sound of swords clashing.. and clinking, it was a heated battle indeed! i watched in horror as they both went down, capturing eachother. There they lay bloody, exhausted , wounded... refusing to let the other go (they ARE males after all, known to be bullheaded)

I dropped to my knees tending to my Master, when a womans voice caught my attention, i watched as she asked citizens, slavers, and even a Beduin, if they knew of Two men, one named Damien ..the other Bobo. watching, tense..alert.. my finger carressing my sword as one pointed her in our direction. I have to admit, she was a vision ..beautiful green gown, Dark hair, fair skin.. so very graceful.

Still watching her, she approached us.. my Husband and Bobo still argueing and threating eachother, the small woman... stomped her delicate little foot, gaining everyones full attention.. she asked who was Damien and who was Bobo.. both Men responded. I noticed a look flash over her face..sadness, joy.. Both men curious as to who she was and what she wanted, asked. Just as the woman was about to respond, a crude little slaver named comte DeCuir started insulting everyone (not very good insults i may add, no wonder tho, he is only a slaver) my heart warmed to this woman as she stepped up and slapped the slaver, He did not take this kindly.. he cut her hair! (luckly she had a wig on.. her true long dark silken tresses tumbled down her shoulders) muttering ..embarrassed at being slapped, the slaver walked away slinging random insults.. im still not sure what he meant by " leaving to find my camel" (i thought that was just a Beduoin thing)

"My Sons" is what she said as she leaned down, tenderly stroking Bobo's cheek..then Damiens

The woman , shakey.. took a deep breath. she coughed a bit (she did not look so well) proceeded to weave a tale. (she clearly had everyones rapt attention) '

Of course, as the story unfolded ..she told of how the Magi stole her babies, Their father was dead.. .. how she searched the lands , heart broken .. but determined , no matter how long it took to find them, i watched as she coughed into her little cloth, trying to hide the bits of blood, my Husband and Bobo in shock, the Men kept questioning.. how did she know? how could she be certain they there brothers and she, their mother? i had the same questions.. then said looked each of them in the eyes and said "do you have a strawberry colored birthmark on your left butt cheek".. having seen my husbands ass many times, i knew this to be true..i gasped, looked over at Marisel..Bobo's Fiancée, by the look on her face, i knew Bobo must have had one as well . Both Marisel and i stepped forward a bit , confirming our knowledge.

Damien and Bobo just looked at eachother in disbelief, their mother wrapped her arms around the two and hugged them fiercly.. the questions were pouring out.. the woman did not look well, i suggested the Men take her to rest and recover... just then, she collapsed!! Bobo just stared.. Damien said " oh shit!"

After a long, brave journey to find her children.. her heart complete, her body gave up (one second, need a moment to compose myself ~sniffles, wipes back a tear~) but her spirit surrounds us like a big warm fuzzy hug.

my Husband and Bobo.. twins, who would have thought. This begs the question, will the battle on the sands between the two still rage?

This letter was hand written lovingly by,
Damiens exquisite puppet, Del.

he sisters in the Magi Tower have put a spell on our panties.

If anyone fondles them without our permission, you will find yourself stricken with impotence, lasting until the next full moon.

Besides, we have removed all our underthings from the Magi Tower and hidden them in a place you will never find.

And we've booby-trapped that place with asps, so... LEAVE OUR UNDERWEAR ALONE!

And for you, Wideopen Parx, watch your back. The last time a magi sister captured you, you promised to not insult any women in Ireem again. She said she'd kill you. She's coming after you now.


The Mad Magi Sisters

*Hosted by WongFei and Anneliese*

Mr. Wong invites you to join us in celebrating his victory as the new Slavers' Leader.

Thursday evening at 6 pm SLT, in the Slavers Inn. (That is in the dwellings area, past the docks.)



Unlike the election campaign itself, he does not intend to pay outright bribes to get you to the party.

Instead, he offers "prizes" for winners of brawling contests.

There will be smaller prizes and larger ones.

Impress the girls, earn prizes, sharpen your skills with the sword.

Top prize: $k 200


Instead of offering slaves, Mr. Wong will take the unusual step of actually PAYING women for their services, rather than just expecting them to give it away.

Any women interested in honest employment for a decent wage, please contact Mr. WongFei in the slavers bay.


All alcohol will be supplied by Ulric, free of charge, of course, so you have no excuses to not come. WongFei may hunt you down if you don't, so you might want to at least make a showing.

Contact Anneliese Wolfenhaut with questions.

A merchant ship, bound for Baghdad, was captured and sunk 5 nights ago. It is unclear who owned the ship and what cargo it was carrying, although it has been rumored that it was ladened with booze and other contraband that had been 'confiscated' from citizens of Ireem.

It appears that there were no survivors. After unloading the cargo the pirates either pressed the crew into service or butchered them. They burned the merchant ship. Some may have seen the reddish glow over the horizon a few nights ago.

Word among the dockworkers is that the palace owned the merchant ship and that it was taking contraband to be sold outside Ireem. Other rumors point to a large shipment that was delivered two days ago to The Ship Inn. I asked the innkeeper to comment. He told me that he had bought more stock to replace the stock that was confiscated by the city to brew and antidote to the poison. Is there a connection? He seems such an innocent but perhaps that is all a mild front for darker affairs. Perhaps we should keep our eyes on this Celt... he may be up to no good.

-Unnamed Reporter

It's been whispered to me now by no less than 4 people, that it's starting to be felt that the slavers of Ireem have gone soft and no longer need to be feared in any way.

Why is this you may ask?...Simple..they are starting to keep harems, instead of selling the girls they capture, they are keeping them as pets and coddle bunnies, for their own pleasures instead of being the mean tempered slavers of old and simply selling meat for profit.

Good thing or bad? Perhaps good for the prey in our city, knowing the slavers will take good care of us...but bad for Ireem's economy as a whole.

- Tre

All groups, clans and subjects of the Kingdom of Sand are warmly invited to visit the shops, services and businesses of Ireem City and support the Merchants Guild. The Guild now numbers more than a dozen members representing nearly every business. Together we can satisfy all your shopping needs for goods and services. If you want more then ask. If the profit is good enough then we might be prepared to help....

{Owners/staff listed as of early November, 2008}

*Cafe Arabesque, Elder Lubitsch, Prop., plus Anja
*The Bath House, Yelena Gazov & Kalique Pichot, new partnered owners with new services and Spa options.
*Knights Inn, London Serevi, Innkeeper
*The Ship Inn, Ulric Dalglish Inkeeper, plus silk Liberty and Drasy Denimore
*Night Club (by Dungeon) currently open for rent, and Bree considering rental.

*The Bakery: Leena Xue, baker
*The Carpet Shop, open for rent
*Pottery Shop, Ripley Babenko, former beggar
*Alchemist, Ash (Andreia Undercroft)

*Library, Bree (Bryselle McCallen), LIbrarian
*Physician, Kerri Kowalski, Healer
*Mystic, Kakyuu Mai, fortune teller with Anneliese
*Seamstress, Mora Lewinter, Prop.
*Blacksmith, Abyss Homewood, Smithy
*Dungeon, awaiting election of Leader of Dungeon Keepers (not recommended for voluntary patronage)

For several days I have roamed the sands and the city of Ireem now. Your kind have forthwith been VERY unwelcoming, I have never seen so much Xenophobia in one place. You creatures are not all despicable, I hope. I have come here as an emissary, and I wish only for a little bit of human respect. The Naga have never dealt directly with your kind until now, understand that we mean no harm unless harm is meant upon us. If one more of your kind attempt to wound or capture me unprovoked it will mean war. I came here to discuss peace, even a possible co-existance. Our kind are a peaceful lot, most of us just wish to exist commonly with humans. So I ask this nicely, respect my kind....and we will show the like.

Jasthiss of the royal brood, Naga Prince.

To the People of Ireem:

I never like to approach delicate matters in a public forum, however, I really feel it must now be done.

The Sultana, her Most Royal Highness, is beloved by us all. Any among us who have been lucky enough to meet her, know her great kindess, her lovely, compassionate nature.

And yes, we can see even when she is veiled, that she is a very beautiful Sultana indeed.

Of course we feel love and affection for her. Of course we admire her beauty. If we are poets, we may fantasize about reciting for her. And it's only natural to wonder how lovely she might look when she dances.

I found no fault with a little dungeon keeper when he expressed these things to me and anyone within earshot the other day.

However, I must say when Ninja Firanelli asked if anyone had seen her "boobies" and if they were "nice boobies", and especially when he said he wished to see her "boobies" for himself, I really think he went too far.

I fought him and captured him, but unfortunately, he slipped out of my grasp before I could bring him to Her Royal Highness for punishment.

In the hopes of bringing honor to her Royal Personage, I must ask that everyone think twice before discussing our Ruler in such a degrading manner. If you must speak of "boobies", please limit it to talk of prey, predators, citizens, and knights, if you must. But leave our Most Exalted Sultana out of any "booby" talk, if you please.

Very concerned,
Anneliese Wolfenhaut

(This note is written on vellum and tied with a pink ribbon. The script is ornate and feminine.)

I have a bit of wisdom to share with the fine citizens of Ireem, particuarly the knights, one of whom I happed to encounter in the Djinn realm this morning. I will not say who it was, but he was with a lady friend, and I must have caught them completely off guard, because one of the first things out of his mouth to her when they saw me was to tell her to jump.

Now, good citizens, I feel it is my duty to inform you that jumping from the window in the djinn realm is not particuarly safe for mortals. It is a long way down for starters, and even though you may get quite a nice view of Ireem while falling, the landing part can be quite problematic. Messy, even. I mean, there is a nice safe teleportation portal for just such a purpose. And knights... that armor some of you wear will not help with the landing any at all. So please, keep this message in mind next time you feel the urge to jump. Also, please try not to mess up our pillows up there. And stop stealing our chocolates.

With kindest regards,


While apartment hunting, my beau, Sir Seraf, and I entered an apartment which was for rent, to have a look around. The "for rent" sign was on the door; it was unoccupied, clean, and available.

We were giving the place a good look-over, checking for signs of bedbugs or lice, that sort of thing. We had heard a bedouin has occupied the room last, so we thought it prudent to make sure he left no vermin behind.

While we were examing the mattress for signs of critters, Jonathan the bedu rented the room, right under our noses! He walked in and immediately locked the door, pocketing the key!

We were stuck in there with him, and I was very concerned, because although the room had been cleaned, there is no telling what kind of creatures might live on his person, and you have all seen my hair. Imagine trying to delouse these locks!

In my panic to keep my distance, I ran to the balcony and jumped off. Sir Seraf soon followed.

We wish to counter any slander with the truth, and to also warn the people of Ireem that Jonathan is tricky and conniving.

That's all.

Lady Enigma

Once again, honor fell upon me and I got to speak with the 3 Bedouins up for lead, they all took their precious time and answered some very important questions for me. Please take some time and read this, we shall soon have a new Bedouin Lead.

"What do you believe that the Bedouins bring to the city of Ireem, what is it they offer in to the city"

*Jonathan Moriarty: The Bedouin bring lots of trade to the city of Ireem. We buy and sell constantly, in a wide variety of commodities. The camp also acts as a big attraction to many tourists. Visitors come from leagues afar to see the Bedouin way of life and their habits and customs. We may not trade in the same quantities as the Slavers, but we are far more stable than they are. More trustworthy, too!

*Chris Wilder: We provide the trade that is part of the life blood of the city.
By bring in the caravans from the desert we bring the spices and other goods that allow Ireem to thrive.

*Kylara Kuhn: I don't think the bedouins offer a lot to the city. And why should we? We are nomads, having our own agenda. Instead we take from what the city, desert or whatever place can offer US. Once in a while the city might profit from us by buying a girl or have some other trade. Beware though... We can negotiate well so there is always a price to pay.

"What do you have to offer your group as a Leader, over anyone else who wishes to be, what is it you feel you would give them to make voting for you a bonus"

* Jonathan Moriarty: I intend to unite the tribe into one solid unit, giving us more power and stability and the ability to repulse cowardly attacks from the unstable and untrustworthy Undead. My key phrase would be "Bedouin Stand Together"

*Chris Wilder: I want to make the bedouins the strongest group in the land. We need a atrong leader to do that. I can both lead my tribe and work with others to make that happen.

*Kylara Kuhn: The group will benefit from someone being not afraid to fight what she stands for. She might lose once and win another time but it will always be with her head up high. That's what I want the bedouins to radiate too. A group not afraid of anything. If we can get that image back then I am happy.

"The folks around Ireem see the Beds as camel loving, stinking, dirty folks, what can you, as a leader, do, to disquiet this feeling, after all , you do live with the camels."

*Jonathan Moriarty: We far prefer living with the camels to living with either the Undead or even the Slavers!
Have you ever smelt a Slaver when he wakes? Yuk! I haven't, but I have heard many dreadful tales from ex-slaver girls.
Our camels frequently turn THEIR noses up at the smell of the Undead, so really, they can't comment on OUR smell, can they?
In addition, we Bedouin all bathe at least twice a year, whether we need to or not - does THAT sound like the habit of dirty people?
We also provide the only commercial means of land transport for goods - our famous camel trains. Where would the Kingdom be without them?

*Chris Wilder: I do not agree with your question and I will make sure you pay for this remark.

*Kylara Kuhn: Yes, we live with camels. Thing is.. they don't stink. Most of the time people saying so are those fishy smelling slavers or the knights who probably smell their upper lip. All I can say is that those who want to speak it out loud, might end up for a night in our camp, being tied up between the camels. Ohhh and... when a camel poops then yes.. they DO stink. Then again.. nobody should be silly enough to lay with those.

"Do you have an plans that could bring your group tighter together, make them work together rather than for only themselves, as it seems most group members do."

*Jonathan Moriarty: Firstly, I don't believe most group members work for themselves - only a small minority. I intend to inspire this minority to pull together for the tribe and therefore increase their own standard of living at the same time.

*Chris Wilder: Yes, I will kill those that do not agree with my leadership and scatter the bones in the desert. That will leave me a core group that will follow me.

That is not to say I mind people also doing what they need to do... We are bedu we must follow our hearts. What I mean by follow is to not interfere with the overall group plans.

*Kylara Kuhn: By nature we are often dwelling the desert by ourselves. Not in need to form a group for our activities because we already have superior hunting skills out in the sand. So that does not need to change. You might be surprised how we already stick up for each other though. Always help if one of us needs it. The only thing that we must improve is that we need to be more ruthless. If someone fights one of us without honour then we repay by getting one of them in return. If needed by capturing that person with a whole group.

"If you were voted as Bedouin Sheikh, what is your first plan of action with your group, an event or meeting, something to make your ties stronger?"

*Jonathan Moriarty: As we are a nomadic tribe, with brethren constantly moving around and without the Kingdom, a single meeting of all is not possible, so I will hold a series of meetings to allow everyone to have their say and for me to gather all views, before taking any major decisions.

*Chris Wilder: I would hold a weekly session at the same time. Each bedu can come and see me with problems or help plan our overall military and trade strategy.

*Kylara Kuhn: The first thing I would do is to talk amongst us to where the group wants us to go. The leader of the bedouins might lead but does not stand above the group in decissions. And you want a good event? Hmm... a nice match who can put the most slavers on the block .

"The bedouins are a wandering group, so I have heard, what is to say to your men that if you are voted in, you will not desert them tomorrow to fullfill some kind of wandering instinct that may come upon you."

*Jonathan Moriarty: My past record speaks for my utter and complete reliability in this regard, as I have been with this tribe ever since coming to the Kingdom.

*Chris Wilder: Well I think I can last two weeks. After that I make no promises as I am a bedu... and you are right we do like to wander, it is in out blood.

*Kylara Kuhn: I do not make that promise. Yes, we are wanderers so yes, tomorrow I might feel the need to wander instead of lead. That's the way it works with us bedouins. The only thing I can promise then is that I would hand over the leadership to someone I think worthy till the moment the group can elect a new leader.

"What is the strongest characteristic you see needed in a Bedouin Sheikh"

*Jonathan Moriarty: Strength of character. The ability to convince the majority of the need for particular decisions, carried out with honour and dignity.

*Chris Wilder: One must be strong, fair and above all have honor as the guide for all actions.

*Kylara Kuhn: As a leader, he or she should be totally fearless and ruthless. If you do not have fear for your enemies then the enemy fears you. That does not mean we should not run away when you are being attacked by more than one person. It just means that you then come back and plant a sword in their backs if needed. It's not about showing honour to those not deserving. Using your sword against one who sleeps kills them just as effectively.

"Do you have any plans for spreading out and becoming more well known in this city? Amongst your group?"

*Jonathan Moriarty: The Bedouin are well known and respected already throughout the walled city.

*Chris Wilder: Yes. But I will not tell you spy for all others...

*Kylara Kuhn: Actually yes, we have been talking about that. It might be only our camp we are safe in but i plan on making the hills around our camp shoudl VERY unsafe for others to hunt in. We had the battle for Eni's hill already a while back. The hills surrounding our camp should be treated as our private hunting grounds.

"Anything you'd like to add to this, final words...before I close this out?"

*Jonathan Moriarty: May the best candidate win!

*Chris Wilder: Yes, I ask the tribe for your vote... you will not regret it.

*Kylara Kuhn: Our bedouin men are well known for their romantic and sensual way of making love. Of course they are because otherwise they would not be able to make out with our women in the first place. So girls wandering out there in the desert: TRY A BEDU! (and give us women finally some nightrest too).

- Tre

I learned today that our gentle, tender, healer, was seen threatening Hojo with her jeweled dagger, she was overheard to be saying that she knows of Hojo's meeting with the Sultana coming up and if Hojo dares to hurt the woman, Kerri will have his head on a platter.

It could only be Hojo who could draw such venom and passion at the same time from this gentle woman, I hope she need never use that dagger she carries.

- Tre

It has come to my attention that while the Sultana may be safe and back in her throne, Hojo Beck seems to have been working to uncover who the real assassin is. It seems a few things have been found...including a letter, oddly crumpled and discarded, listing the ingredients used in making up the poison that was used on the sultana, this letter was found amongst the good Knight Dream's personal property.

Hojo has been heard to be saying he plans on making a great amount of money when he turns over his captive knight to the Sultana and is seeking a way to get this done.

Have we all been blinded by the good Knight Dream? Is he after all this time...the assassin?

- Tre

As I was wandering around yesterday, doing as I usually do...snooping and such, I decided to explore the magi tower, I'd never been inside it, very beautiful place by the way.

Down in the basement of it I stumbled upon Anne and the Sultana...I went into shock, and then screamed out for Knights or anyone around to come help, not sure why Anne would be alone with the Sultana in the basement of the magi tower.

The good Knight Camell did come running, as Anne took off for safety, she and the Sultana trying to explain to me that Anne was not a part of this, I'd need more info before printing any of that yet.

I am very pleased to say our Sultana is back in her place of power, where she belongs, I believe she was being hidden against any further assassination attempts made on her life..but the bad part of all this is that the assassin , the true assassin is still out there, beware folks.

- Tre

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