The Ireem Chronicles

Dear Granny I am living with a man whose wife just left him a few months ago. They have a daughter and son together but she ran away with them. I have been seeing him in secret behind his wife for over a year anyway, but the problem is that I am still jealous of her. He talked about their children all the time and always going on about the nice time they have together. Is that normal? I feel like I am just a second choice to her despite my much higher social standing. And I always wonder that he only chose me because she ran away. What should I do?

Granny Get a hold of yourself is what I say! Because I don't really have a answer. For the thousands and thousands of men that I have been with (oi, you at the back, stop the snickering!) none of them would spend anytime thinking about other women. I guess you could try some self improvement. Ask the Djinn doctor to give you a bigger boobs, or go to the Bakery to learn some cooking. Failing that, there is always the House of Pleasure where you can picked up some bedroom tricks too.

============================

Dear Granny The man I married is wonderful. Trouble is his mother is terrible. She is always trying to gain his affections. Recently her tricks has been getting worse. Not only she was always hanging out in our tent, but she was trying to bribe our children with toys and camel milk sweets! What should I do to deal with this in law from hell?

Granny Try anal sex and win his heart. If it doesn't work, at least the pain would drive you mad enough to kill that horrid woman.