More advises from Ireem's agony aunt..... Granny Robyn
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Dear Granny..... I am a young bedu woman and I have met my current partner few months ago. He was a virgin when we first get together. When we used to fight, I told him about all the men that I have been with to make him jealous. I now realise I was wrong, and I know that I only care about him. He is extremely jealous and angry about it though even til now. Sometimes he still called me horrible names when we fight. What should I do to make it up to him?
Granny Tell him that he is immature and stop being a immature. All my men knew about my past sexual life, in fact most of them don’t last long enough for me to tell them everything. If he cannot accept that once upon a time you were a bit of a slut (Let’s face it, who isn’t?) when you were young, I would say you should just dump the immature idiot. Unless, of course, if he has a rather large tool. Then send him to me so I can teach him a lesson.
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Dear Granny..... I am a young mother who had been through many terrible things. I can safely say I am the most unfortunately woman alive. I had experience every trauma that is, such as breaking a nail in the morning, dropping my trident on my foot in the afternoon, getting kick out of my clan because I had a baby with an idiot living underground, and get call all sort of horrible names by other people because my partner is an idiot. Things got really worse not when my idiot partner seems to be spending more and more time with his slaves and the women he hunted. Maybe it’s because I had a baby and he doesn’t enjoy sex with me anymore, or maybe he just like his new slaves more? To combat that, I have been seeing other men behind his back. I have even let myself to be captured and abused by some vile Bedouin man just so I can have some attention. But it is hard to live a life feeling so insecure that I need some random men to kidnap me in order to get some sex! What should I do? I don’t want to leave my idiot partner and the father of my child. Should I just kill all his slaves?
Granny Try offer him anal sex.
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Dear Granny...... I have discovered that my badass undead husband has been spending time and night with another undead who seems to like male. Although my husband denied any infidelity. The other night when I came back home, I found him anally masturbating and screaming out his friend’s name. When I confronted him, he told me that it was just a phase, and ask me to have sex with him with a rolling pin from now. Do you think I should end this sham of a marriage now?
Granny Learn to enjoy it. Sex with rolling pin is more fun than you think. Trust Granny on that.
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Dear Granny... a clan sister who is younger than me starts to follow me around recently and wear the same clothes, copy the way I speak and even trying some of my hobbies. I have discussed my concern with the Emir of my clan, but he seems to be more interested in getting us in bed instead. Other girls said I should be flattered. But I think that’s really creepy. I don’t want to start a conflict as I was told repeatedly that Bedouins should not fight another Bedouins. What should I do?
Granny Push the creepy bitch into the ditch the next time she cleans her camel. Problem solved.
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