The Ireem Chronicles

Welcome to pusherball.

This game is sponsored by the faboulous Blacksmith of Ireem shop - the best quality and smittyhandcraft in Ireem.

Pusherball is a lot like soccer and rugby in a mix.

There are two teams, one blue team and one red team with three people in ech team. Red team wear something red and blue team wear something blue, please.

Rules are simple: Each team would try to score a goal by pushing the ball over to the goal on the other teams side.You can use any part of the body to push the ball, except for your genitalias. The team that scores most in 5 minutes wins. If theres a tie, there will be a rematch of 3 minutes

The refferee in all the games is yours truly, shutup.

One game is 5 minutes long. When all team has played the team with most victories are the winners


The winprize is 1000 g for each of the three members of the winning team and a golden pusherball with inscription.

To have bettings on this games each of the teams must choose a captain that will be in charge of the team and will also be the person one bets on. Nobody can change team when the tournament has started but you can add anyone that is not allready in a team if your whole crew doesnt show up.

So grab your friends and neighbours and make teams of three people or creatures or whatever you are.

If you dont have enough friends or neighbours just show up and maybe you will be asked to join other teams that miss a member when it starts. If you dont want to play, just be a cheerer and make bets.

Blue Lagoon Cafe is now open with Misti and Polo as new owners!

Take a walk over to beautiful West side of the river, in the main village marketplace...

Come see us! Why? Because we love to have fun!!

If in need of an enticing refreshment come have wine with us.

Hungry? We have food!

Want to take your sweetheart for a romantic moonlit dance overlooking the water? We have the spot.

In the mood to play games? We have games to play *wink wink* (with possible prizes but don't tell anyone...shhhh).

Or if you are just wanting to chill and chat....come see us. There might even be some beautiful bellydancers to entertain you.


Hours of operation:

.......until (the camels come home)

Polo and Misti

Upcoming: Ireems Dance contest.
location: SlavesHead Inn
time : Friday august 5th at noon

To bring some laugher and fun back in ireem the SlavesHead Inn is proud to present a fabulous event on this friday to come : a Dance Contest.
With a jury carefully selected by our beloved Sultana herself , you can winn a prize up to G$ 2000,-

All girls are invited to join this great event. Please note that not only the dancesikills are part of the judgement, also the attire will be build in the outcome. Put on your best dance-silks -practice your moves and all.. sign in to be part of this contest. I am sure this will be the talk of the town for years to come.

Drinks and snacks are on the house. Served by Ireems most beautifull slaves.
Even if you dont dance yourself .. this is an event you dont want to miss!

To enter the contest please contact Am Demina or MeBo Grut

To the horror of Ireem citizens a hideous member of the undead, Teena Nateas, recently and with no provocation, committed attacks within the city. One of those attacks involved a new born baby, as reported by Pasha Braveheart

For unknown reasons, Teena began attacking MeBo, a Bedouin, growling something about revenge for his brother Jos. While Teena chased her through the city, MeBo ducked into the physcians' office hoping to evade capture. Thinking she had succeeded in tharting further attack, she engaged in conversation with the head physician Dr Anna who was preparing to heal Mebo's wounds while holding her new born baby Rin. This is when the attack became more sinister, when Anna felt arrows piercing her skin. Bravely confronting the attacker, Anna demanded that Teena put down his weapons since it was against the law to fire such weapons in the city! Sneering obscentities, Teena then pulled out his sword and delivered two direct hits upon Anna and shockingly injuried baby Rin in the process!

Taking flight to the desert, Teena was chased by the irate citizens of Ireem, who were screaming and taking up their weapons and other cooking utensils against the vile, meanspirited, ugly, stinky, disgusting and criminal undead. Leading the chase was the courageous Majid who fought bravely and captured the culprit! Surrounded by the citizens of Ireen, Teena outrageously still threatened Anna and her baby as well as the rest of the crowd. Majid handed the criminal over to Anna who remained very controlled through this traumatic experience. Fortunately, Anna was able to heal her wounds and those of baby Rin. A report is pending on this despicable act and Chronicles will stay on the story and provide a follow-up report.

It should be noted that just days later, Teena was observed at the gates of the city, menacingly taunting Djinns Polo Olchowy and Misti Darkmatter resulting in an altercation between Teena and Polo. Chasing and fighting through the desert, Polo returned as the winner of the conflict. All in all, this just proves that Teena is still a annoyance to Ireem and deserves to be brought to justice.

It's been reported that a brutal and nasty robbery took place at the Chronicles tonight.

According to the printing staff at the office, a Djinn girl bursted into the office and knocked out two printing staff who was working on a night shift. She then goes through the office before breaking into the cash box which holds the collection for the Ireem Kittie Fund, a charitity who looks after the homeless kittens in Ireem.

The vile theft made stole 400 dinars from the charity which would serious hampered the good work Ireem Kittee Fund has been doing, as well as the injuries the two staff suffered from the brutal attack. Therefore, the Chronicles is urging anyone who is in support of the good cause done by the Ireem Kittee Fund to hunt down this theft and hand her over to the Knight. The thief has been identified as Chaya (( GoorgeouszsChayya Resident ))

The person who successfully captured the theft will received a special gift from the Editor of Chronicles.

Do you find yourself still chasing mermaid? Or riding the magic carpet? If that's the case then consider yourself OUTDATE!

Dancing your butt crazy until they are too firm for spanking, while holding two fire sticks in each hands just because it's never hot enough in Ireem! Go and join your nearest fire dancing group! Ignore what those health conscious Undead told you and lit the fire of your life and dance!

Has the recent events signal a potential implosion within the Undead Leadership? The Chronicles spoke to a few people regarding this current hot topic


Those who read the news recently would have no doubt already know about a recent incident of an Undead sex slave Alina being captured by the Vicious Granny Robyn DeCradle. During the few days, Granny Robyn managed to extract a lot of information relating to the Undead and some of the inner working of the secretive creatures. While a lot of it were trivial, such as Alina's hatred toward her own clan for failing to rescue her from Davey, there were a few more interesting and potentially explosive revelation that was not known to anyone until now . One of those revelation was Davey's desire to raise an undead army.

During the information extraction (with the help of a frying pan, we believe), Alina revealed to Granny Robyn that Davey's attack on Juliet was not only motivated by his lust on pregnant women, but also want to use her to threaten others, including the father of her baby, to join his force. The original plan was to captured her into the catacomb until her baby was born and then use the baby to blackmail Juliet's friends and families. That itself, while not surprising, does raised an interesting point as to the ultimate goal of such undead army.

One of the expert we have spoke to on this topic, a mystic who would like to remain anonymous, agreed that there might be a hidden reason behind Davey's recruitment drive, "Davey had once requested help from a lady mystic to offer him a vision for his future." The mystic told us, "The Lady Mystic may have foreseen this split among the Undeads? It is said this shall come to pass. The vision had shown Davey of the undeads will spawn many children. Growing a Strong bloodline."

"And what is the purpose of this spawning of children? Maybe he needs some child labour for his rotten meat butcher in the city?" we asked

"No. The Goal is POWER. Davey seeks leadership of the Undeads for himself and for his sex slave Alina to be Queen. Also, in this vision it was noted that Damien is the one responsible for Davey and his family... his past wife Sun and their son) whom were given into Hades hand.. tortured.. because Damien knew of the threat of this vision from the Mystic.... It was a way for him to Keep his Power in Leadership and his own Bloodline Strong."

"Also Alina hates Damien. The unspoken threat he holds against her Mate and children. Being a protective mother she will love the power. Every undead wants her master to succeed and that adds security to her position. Being mother and Queen of the Undeads will make for a strong bloodline. On top of that Davey has promised Hades God of the Underworld many new souls through his offspring. With a Blood Covenant he sealed the deal with Hades Himself.

"Once these offspring come into their powers of darkness, Davey with his offspring will deliver Damien in chains for Hades to keep in the underworld for eternity. Davey sent the half breed firstborn child from Him and Alina. Not away for safety from the enemies of Ireem. but for the safety from Damien who has suspicions that Davey is not as loyal as he appears." The final point was interesting, and it was confirm with the information Granny had extracted.

"Alina said she had sent her first child away," Granny told us, "At first I thought she meant her old Bedouins clan. But most Bedouins are peace lovers so I very much doubt they would harmed her baby, regardless the fact that she had gave herself up to the Undead and had betrayed many of her clans sisters in the past."

It is certainly a difficult time for the Undead if those vision proved to be true. The sign of trouble had already shown after recently stories that Alina and Davey are forced to seek help from the Knight to protect themselves from being attacked. There was also an unconfirmed rumour that the Ai, the second in command of the Knights, was seen by an undead slave visiting Davey's comb and spent over an hour in there with Davey.

As always, the Chronicles will bring you the latest development of this story when we discover more in the near future.

The Chronicles can report that Xia, the leader of the Temple Guards, has been returned to the Temple after a daring rescue mission

The mission was carried out by the infamous Magi “The Vicious Granny” Robyn DeCradle. After numbers recon missions, including some observation near the catacomb, Granny and her team confirmed that Xia was captured by Davey and his gang of sex slaves. Once the information was confirmed, Granny Robyn hatched up a plan to capture the head sex slave Alina near the city.

The capture went according to plan when Granny was on a morning shopping trip of bread and men. After some fierce fighting and desperate running on the part of Alina, Granny successfully captured the undead sex slave. The final blow was believed to be delivered by the much dreaded “Frying Pan of Death”, which involved Granny swinging her frying pan at the back of the Undead's head to knock out the enemy. Some of the famous sufferers of the pan including Miriam and Nessa of Zafirah and the slaver Am Demina ( co-editor note: as well as the editor of Chronicles during a dispute of salary ).

Once the head sex slave was captured, Granny took her to the Magi tower. Using her abilities, Granny managed to extract a lot of valuable information related to the Undead from Alina. The information has been handed over to the correct authorities including the Palace, Hashim, the city’s Pest Control, as well as leaders of the some Bedouin clans because there were a lot of plans which were specifically targeted at them. After extracting information, Granny’s next step was to lock Alina up in her magic collar, which prevented anyone from releasing her without killing her. Then a message was sent to the Undead, “Release Xia back to the temple, and Alina will be freed.”

It took a few days before the Undead finally responded. During which time, the head sex slave was under the care of Granny and the trapping of the collar. Being the kind old lady that she is, Granny didn’t charge the Undead for the caring cost. In fact, once she discovered that Alina was carrying a baby beast inside of her, Granny performed healing magic onto her to relieve the physical pain (though not the psychological pain of carrying a beast which will turn into a vile rapist like the father). After some hard negotiation from the Undead Ambassador, which at one point was threatening to start a war (that was laughed off by Granny, who kindly pointed out that the Undead has been at a two-men war against the city for a while now), a deal was finally reached: Davey would return Xia to the temple and Granny would release Alina, so essentially it was exactly the same conditions as Granny set out from the start and the negotiations were a royal waste of time for all parties.

Credits to the Undead though, they have fulfilled their promise and returned Xia to the city. With the help of another Magi, Raven, Granny has also released Alina from her magic collar. The exchange was witnessed peacefully by the esteemed Doctor of Ireem, Anna and her gorgeous friend Brie. Despite a little hiccup toward the end (The unlocking process required a drop of blood from a virgin, which as we all know, is an extreme rarity in Ireem), everything went according to plan. Xia was returned to the temple safely and was treated by Dr Anna for post-traumatic stress, and Davey had his head sex slave back.

The Temple of Zin Ray would like extend their thank you to everyone involved in the rescue mission. Over the next few days, the Chronicles will also run special editions to cover the information that was extracted from Alina, related to the secret war plan of the Undead as well as the other secrets.

A despicable crime happened today in the City of Ireem

The Physician office, run by the much loved mother, Dr Anna, was robbed today. The culprit was identify as Ponzio of Zalifah. He was seen violently robbing the till in the office and knocks over some valuable medicines as he flee from the scene.

The Chronicles spoke to the staff in the office, who were still shaking from the experience, "We were working and treating some elderly in the office today, when the man burst into the office. He went straight to the cash till and smashed it apart and stole all the money inside. He even destroy a lot of the stuff in the office and frighten those elderly citizen who was receiving their weekly free treatment."

We tried to reach out to Dr Anna for her comment. But she is still recovering at home after her recent child birth. No doubt the incident would have upset her greatly, since the office was always under finacial constrain due to the low price that Dr Anna insists on charging the citizen. She was quoted saying that the Physcian Office is about fair and free treatment to those who needed, not a way to earn money. So this despicable and down right cowardly robbery has created much anxiety to the office. There is possibly that free medicine to children and senior citizen will have to stop until new donation can be find.

The Chronicles has always supported charitable causes in Ireem. We therefore would donated the all the earning we generate in the next edition of the paper. In addition out Editor would personally donate a sizeable amount to keep the Office running in the next few days. Any one who would like to contribute to the good cause please do so by visiting the Physician Office and make you donation directly to the cash till.

Lastly, the Chronicles would like to announce that anyone who can bring this hospital robber Ponzio to justice, will be handsomely rewarded by the paper.

The Chronicles understands that a recent incident in the Palace had led to the curious arrest of a goat

The incident took place a while ago when the Countess was enjoying an quiet evening in the palace, the goat, which believe to be the pet of the Djinn Queen, Indigo was involved in a scuffle with another beast named Belz. During the scuffle, they have accidentally broke the aqueduct in the palace and resulted an almost drowning of the Countess. As expected, the palace guards act promptly and bravely, but as expected, their lack of direction sense and general awareness meant at the end, it was the goat who managed to rescue the Countess to safety

Though curiously, the guards decided arrested the goat. Whether it was done in order to cover up their own incompetence or other reasons is not yet clear. The Chronicles tried to speak to the Captain of the guards, but because she is still on her summer vacation, we have yet to get an answer on that.

As usual, the Chronicles will be following this news item with interest.

Press Release of the Gladitorial match, taking place next sunday

The July 31 Gladiatorial Games will be for Male fighters only. Three winner will remain free and be awarded Prizes and Pleasure Slaves.

Prizes will be awarded for the 1st, 2nd and Third places:
1st - First choice of one of three women who will serve at your pleasure for 24 hrs, and 500g
2nd- Choice of the two remaining woment and 250g
Thrid- recieves remaining woman as prize, no cash.

The slaves may not be auctioned or traded. Though they may be released to freedom.

Dirjha Summers, Mor Blackthorne, and Druxsilla Moonwall have volunteered to the prizes for the July 31st games. Chitralekha Resident: has agreed to be a Stand by should one of the others is unable to serve.

Gladiators who do not place 1st, 2nd or 3rd will surrender to a designated Arena Employee to be sold on the Auction Block. They will serve their master or mistress for 24 hours.

One pardon is being Auctioned this week and may be used for a July 31st Gladiator. only. It must be applied for the specific participant's benefit before the first auction is begun.

Since many women expressed interest in fighting, The August 7th fights will be All Female with the same rules and conditions. Details for this event will be forthcoming.

Entering this event is a sign of acceptance of serving a 24 hour term of Indenturement (Slavery.) if the player is not one of the the three winners or the Pardon is not used toward his benefit, h emust surrender himself to the appointed Arena Employee for purpose of auctioning.

The owner of the Arena had angrily lashed out at the other business owners in Ireem

The Chronicles reporter was told about an angry tirade from the Arena owner, Yannena, who was visually and verbally upset about what she considered as the decay of service quality in the city. Here is the exact quote of what she was shouting,

"After reading the doctrin of the BLA I have to say I suport a great deal of what they say, in so far as having the responsibility to suport and work towards the bettering of the city for all. With the rash of abcent or traveling shop owners. The quality of services inthe city has sank to a new low, no dancing girls, stock run out for days, no public drunkenness and less law bussiness.

I am sending this parchment out with a challange form those owners abroad, come home and serve your city as you agreeed to for the better of all and the glory of the Sultana. To that that rise to this challange HAZA!!

To those who turn deal ears as long as their coin purses stay full. Shame I say to you, take a noble step and give your bussiness to the Bedu liberation Army. Let people who want to work, have a chance to do so and not let our beloved city be cast down by Apathy."

It is not clear whether she was targeting any particular business owner. After some investigation, our reporter discovered that several business owners, such as the owner of the cafe and the owner of the Mystic shop do indeed fit into that profile or not being around much lately. Whether this is related to the BLA is also unclear, since no much is known of them and it's certainly the first time the Chronicles heard about the link between the BLA and the Arena. We will be bringing you more of this news when we hear more.